Grant Hayes Uncommon History

Vernon Leadbeater's patented ABDOMINA Sole Stitcher (ASS). Leadbeater's ingenuity turned gastro-intestinal infection to good use, harnessing gut spasms to power a loom that could stitch as many as 40 boot soles per hour. The key component of the device was an antimony disc charged with heptic orthophranes. The military applications of the ABDOMINA were clearly evident, but a lucrative contract with the US Army was compromised when the Bolivian plantation whence Leadbeater sourced his orthophranes was destroyed in the Guano War (1879-83). Leadbeater was unable to obtain orthophranes of the required purity from elsewhere, and his army contract foundered amid a storm of recrimination. Leadbeater died a year later, a broken man in Hoboken NJ. 

(by the one and only Grant Hayes)