Indignant Tree Post

"Excuse me madam." Said Arthur, pretending to be a talking tree and freaking Phyllis out," A short, bald man just peed there, and, I'm sorry to inform you, you're standing in it. Yes, men pee on us! It's just another indignity us poor trees must suffer. I'm sure they only do it because we're immobile and they take pleasure in reminding us."                                                                        
"Men can be such beasts sometimes."said Phyllis' slightly worried that she must now educate Arthur in the finer points of communing with nature and wondering if he will think less of her when she is forced to reveal that trees can talk.