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"It rained and it's rusted together" said Gawain a little flustered. "I can't move.Take my horse and go get some WD 40 and my angle grinder." "Enough of your excuses!" replied Gwendoline,"Do you really think I don't know why your 'Cedric' won't stand to attention? I've seen you with that pansy squire of yours. Let him save you. What kind of man wears armor to a seduction anyway. Thanks for the horse." |
Tuesday, 13 March 2012
Abandoned By A Woman Scorned
Monday, 12 March 2012
Saturday, 10 March 2012
Everyday Sayings That Originated In The Bible
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"What's the matter Daniel?" said almighty God, "Cat got your tongue?" |
In The Age Of Chivalry
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"Oh my God! It's Galahad and he's killed Sir Frederick!" thought Gertrude horrified. "Hasn't he seen 'likes bondage' on my blogger profile?" Painting by Sir Frank Dicksee 1885 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Dicksee |
Friday, 9 March 2012
Jane Austin's Emma Out Takes
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'I lay it down as a general rule," Emma had said to Harriet some months previously," that if a woman doubts as to whether she should accept a man or not, she certainly ought to refuse him. If she can hesitate as to "Yes," she ought to say "No" directly.'" She was most sure of this at the time and definitely had no intentions towards Mr Knightly whom she considered a total dork. How was she to know then the intense erotic pleasure of the Knightly anal probe and the delightful ecstasy when he dubbed her the very pinnacle of probing delight. "I've probed more than a thousand girls on this planet and never has woman's a rectum captivated me so!" said Knightly, unperturbed that his friends where heading back to the home galaxy without him. |
Monday, 5 March 2012
High On Cherub Spray
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"I want those f'ing cherubs gone before Joe gets home!" said Mary thinking this was the guy from the exterminator's, "And what is that stuff you're on? Is it poisonous? ARE YOU HIGH?" "You shall conceive a son!" said Gabriel from his cloud, "And you shall call him Jesus!" "Oh right! And what's Joe going to think about this? You do know he's impotent? If you want to help out, just spray the f'ing cherubs and give Joe a hard on!" "And another thing,"said Gabriel,"this isn't Cherub spray. It's a cloud. It gets me much higher than this!" |
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