Welcome Earthlings and Others

Welcome to my blog. The text on this blog is original so please don't borrow it without asking me or adding an acknowledgement as to the source. Please, please, please, click the share buttons on anything as often as you like. Please, please, please leave a comment or become a follower. If you can think of an alternative caption leave it as a comment and, if I like it enough, I'll post it with a backlink to your blog. Enjoy.

Friday, 10 February 2012

What Really Happened on the Road to Damascus.

"Pull my finger!" said Jesus from his cloud on high. With trepidation Saul rode forward and pulled only to be nearly knocked from his mount as Jesus farted out an entire new religion. Saul was so embarrassed he changed his name to Paul and stopped hanging out with his Pharisee mates. To this very day, when some one says "pull my finger" people run for cover.


Humor from Saint Augustine

"I've just flown in from L.A.," Said Saint Augustine, "and boy, are my arms tired!" 
"L.A?" said Rastas
"Where?" asked Cirus of a nearby dying man.
Clearly, when it came to humor, the good saint was ahead of his time.


Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Cupid Spits The Dummy

For cupid it was one of those light bulb moments. He was a teenager now and he'd had enough.  Stalking young couples in flagrante delicto and firing his arrows into their upturned bare arses was giving him a permanent and painful erection that was so bad he'd complained to the big guy himself who gave him a crappy old blue towel to drape over it for modesties sake, and a flippant "get over it" to fob him off. Moreover, when he finally found a hot young maiden and shot an arrow into her arse for himself, instead of falling in love with him, she'd taken one look at his protruding tumescence, and run shrieking to the local constabulary. He now had a restraining order against him and was subpoenaed to appear in court to answer to 'malicious wounding'. No! If God wanted love he could do the hard work himself! The light bulb in his mind exploded with magnificent retort, he snapped his bow a twain, and dropped his arrows into a convenient dumpster.


Monday, 6 February 2012

Relaxing With The Family After Conquering The Barbarian Hordes

Strip twister was a popular pastime in Ancient Rome. The whole family could play, even the cherub and the horses!  

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