Cupid Denied

"No I'm not going to 'pull your finger!'" yelled Mary in exasperation, "Last time you did a jobbie on me!" 

Cupid Goes Through A Hoon Phase

During his teenage years, Cupid took to annoying people by zapping past way too close on a nifty racing cloud. Sometimes he would bomb victims with a fresh "number two" so it was little wonder that people applauded when the Romans introduced conscription. The squadrons of the Imperial Cherub Bomber Command were to become the very scourge of barbarians throughout the known World.

Never Trust Cupid

"Hey! That's Mummy!" said Timothy with a voice like a soccer ball with a hole in it,"She just went out to walk the dog! And that's Mr Williamson, my headmaster! Why is he wearing that funny outfit and why is mummy naked? He's not a gynecologist.  Cupid! Have you been playing tricks?"
"Maybe....?" answered Cupid Sheepishly.
"And why am I naked? And why am I carrying this silly sink plunger with a fire in it?"
"You'll find out when we get to the Priory..."
Cupid sure was acting strange today. What ever he was up to Timothy was about to learn the hard way....

Cupid Spits The Dummy

For cupid it was one of those light bulb moments. He was a teenager now and he'd had enough.  Stalking young couples in flagrante delicto and firing his arrows into their upturned bare arses was giving him a permanent and painful erection that was so bad he'd complained to the big guy himself who gave him a crappy old blue towel to drape over it for modesties sake, and a flippant "get over it" to fob him off. Moreover, when he finally found a hot young maiden and shot an arrow into her arse for himself, instead of falling in love with him, she'd taken one look at his protruding tumescence, and run shrieking to the local constabulary. He now had a restraining order against him and was subpoenaed to appear in court to answer to 'malicious wounding'. No! If God wanted love he could do the hard work himself! The light bulb in his mind exploded with magnificent retort, he snapped his bow a twain, and dropped his arrows into a convenient dumpster.